Every year we get hit by “Graduation Season”. Kids leaving middle or high school and going on to college or, kids leaving college and stepping out into the big ol’ world. I have been to a few graduation ceremonies and I always think how encouraging it is to have such amazing speakers talking to these transitioning kids at the point where they are ready for their next chapter of life. One day”, I joke with my friends, some important school will call me to do the speech and they will give me a Honorary Degree, I’ll get to keep that weird floppy hat. But to-date no school has called so I have resigned to printing my speech here. Enjoy.
Congratulations on reaching a lifetime milestone. Your work from this point will not be harder or easier, just different, and likely more fun. In any case, always know that there are friends around you that will share the burdens and friends who will be there to help celebrate the victories. There is always someone who can guide you, advise you, and support you. Everyday and every way. Usually you call them Mom or Dad, but today I would like to be your adviser and offer you this advice.
As you move into this next phase of life there 10 quick but important bits of advice that will make your efforts easier if you understand them, or more difficult if you ignore them.
First ground rule: your life is made up of your own perceptions. How you choose to perceive the world is how the world is. If it seems like a constant battle, you have waged that war. If it seems like bliss, it is you that has calmed those raging seas. Your experience through life will be only as difficult as you want to make it. Choose to see things as controllable.
Next; life might seem to be broken and falling apart, but as a friend of mine says “Maybe life is falling together.” As I mentioned perception before, it is on you to see the world as under your control and direct the construction or destruction of all around you. You are stepping into a very powerful position because the future is dependent on what you make it. Trust that life will turn out as it is supposed to, it’s a process.
- Live your days enjoying the beauty and complexity of our world. Don’t waste your energy and time complaining about what could have, should have, or might have been. You have beautiful opportunities all around you, act on them, and live your adventure. Remember that only you can assign meaning to things. If they are important to you, care for them, nurture them and make them important to the world.
Next rule: you can handle more than you think that you are capable. People are asked how they made it through after suffering a mishap or set-back. And many reply that they just kept on living. Personal, financial, emotional, professional setbacks will happen and you will weather them and survive because you have strength that even you mom didn’t know you had.
- That being said; know that it is impossible to be angry and grateful at the same time. One cannot be appreciative and feel deep sorrow simultaneously. So look for things to be grateful for. Make it a habit to appreciate life as it happens for you.
Ground rule number 6: Be happy you are having problems. The only people who don’t have problems are the ones who don’t do anything. If you are having difficulties it is because you are living in forward motion. Your adventure will always have ups and downs. Appreciating the downs makes the ups just that more glorious.
- And again, know that your attitude should be based on how you want the world, how you want life, to be. Don’t set your attitude by what other have handed you. That only leads to being frustrated and unhappy. The way you grow from loss or defeat is to keep your attitude based on learning and progress. No one every grew from being stagnant and defeated.
- When other people feed you their opinions, allow them to feed your mind not starve your spirit. Learn from what people say, do, and feel. But speak your own words, think your own thoughts, and feel your own heart. You are what matters in your world to be sure, but know that giving of yourself will not only make your world a better place, but will change the life of so many others as well. Giving to others is an amazing feeling, selfishly set out to give yourself that joy as much as possible.
- Always do what is right by your own principles. Doing the right thing will give you strength and allow you to share your strength with others. Doing things, the easy way may make life smoother right now, but easy and right are often very different choices. Choose the long term right over the short-term simple.
And lastly, feel free to break a few rules, shoot the sacred cows, challenge traditions. The world needs new thinking, thinking from outside the box, from outside the comfort zone. Do not fear doing things differently. Everything that is done today was once thought surely insane years ago.
So there are 10 ground rules to move forward with healthy perspective and guarantee your own success:
- Choose to see life as controllable
- Trust that life will turn out as it’s supposed to, though it might need a few tweaks.
- If things are important to you, give them everything you have, love, nurture, and protect them with every part of your being.
- You can and will win at this game called life, even when you seem to be losing, remember that you have strength that even you mom didn’t know you had.
- Create the habit to appreciate life as it happens for you. Being appreciative allows us to enjoy every day.
- Problems just indicate that you are working your way to the top. People without problems are the ones happy to stay on the bottom.
- Keep your attitude positive. Other people can affect your life only as much as you allow them.
- Be advised by other people and things but think your own thoughts and be your own person. Develop a set of rules and principle that will never falter.
- Make decisions based on what is right for the longest time for the most people. Don’t decide to do it the easy way or the quickest way, that almost always turns out badly.
- And lastly, don’t be afraid to be different. The only people who have changed the world are the ones who refused to think like everyone else.
No go forth, go on to your next adventure, live you dream, build your world, and always remember that you will not adventure alone. Share your life with friends, family, and the world. Now show us all what you can do.