As I am sure you have surmised, I am not a big “Holiday” person. I’m the cynical kind of guy who calls Valentines day a “Hallmark holiday”. In fact it is a church sanctioned celebration of some Saint Valentine. I say “some” because there are actually accounts of several Valentines in church history and all of them were martyred. The details on any one of them, however, are fuzzy. There is actually one legend that says a “Valentine” fell in love with his jailer’s daughter and sent her a note proclaiming his love and signed it “from your Valentine.”
Relationships; like so many things, are different for each individual. Personally, I think that every time we meet a new person, there is the potential to grow a new relationship. They say that everyone we meet has a purpose: some will test you, some will teach you, some will use you, some will bring out your best, and others may bring out your worst. But they will all bring something to the table. If every person could be a potential relationship, then we should treat each person as having a value. Understand that I’m not saying that all relationships will be made of love. I have had relationships of great mutual disdain. I still consider them relationships and value them as teaching me many different things about myself. For that I am always grateful.
So this weird holiday comes upon us each year and we are led to provide cards, flowers or chocolates. But some folks just don’t go in for those things, so we substitute other gifts of “love”. My wife, for example, is not big on chocolates (when I get her chocolates, I usually end up eating them, so I from my perspective they make a great gift.) So now what do I get her? Shampoo? Oooh romance.
There are many types of love. We can love our pets, love pizza, or love a good time. Maybe even “loving your shoes” can count for something. I do love mine, maybe I should get them something nice. (Chocolate?)
I believe that a good relationship; whether it’s a friend, a loved one, a pet or a shoe, is all about 1 thing: Time. When we give something our time, we give them a portion of our life. My mother used to say There are only 2 things that you can truly give another person: your promise and your time. I see her wisdom now more than ever. If we truly love something, we give it our life, we don’t spend money on candy or flowers, we spend hours or even minutes.
Maybe this year this year forgo the flowers, the gifts or the candy for your loved ones. Instead do something together where you have to actually interact with each other. Spend time with them; appreciate the similarities you have together and respect the differences. Share time because after all, that is what love is all about.
So Happy Valentine’s day, from your Valentine …………Awwww
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