What Makes Winners Win?

Years ago, when my oldest sone was only 8, we watched the Olympics together as a family. As a coach, you can bet, we watched every conceivable Olympic competition.  We watched track, triathlon, sand volleyball, court volleyball, tennis, water polo, biking, fencing, archery (online), and even wrestling. And we of course watched Gymnastics but we tried to see a little of everything. In the midst of it all, my deep thinking 7.9 year old son asks me “I know some teams have better coaches than others but what makes some of the not famous (read that as “from smaller countries or underdogs”) people win?” What makes a winner a winner? I had and still have a policy that I always answer questions that my kids ask, I try to give them a good understanding of their inquiries.  So what did I say?

Winners are winners for many different reasons. Sadly, sometimes people win because they were lucky or in the right place at the right time. But I don’t think that’s the answer to your question. Sometimes they win because other people lose. Winners outlast everyone else, when everyone else is too tired to get up one more time or too frustrated to try one more time, the winner gives it one more go. Their passion won’t let them give up.  Winners have something inside that tells them to try again and try harder. But that thing inside doesn’t only talk to them at the Olympics, it talks to them during training. It talks to them during breakfast, it talks to them before bed. They talk to themselves and say “I am worth it and I can do it” then….they are worth it, and they can do it.”

Granted it’s not word for word and I’m sure I was interrupted during my answer with other questions but that was it in a nutshell. But I still only scratched the surface. But, What Makes a Winner?

• Small Steps to Success: Winners celebrate small victories along the way rather than focusing solely on the end goal.
• Inner Satisfaction: Winning is about self-satisfaction, not just tangible rewards like medals or trophies.
• Problem-Solving Mindset: Winners see challenges as fuel, driving them to find creative solutions through imagination, hard work, and perseverance.
• Action-Oriented: Winners make decisions, act, and adjust as needed, while others get stuck overthinking and fearing failure.
• Facing Fear: Winners acknowledge fear but don’t let it control them; they use it as a guide, not a barrier.
• Focus on the Present and Future: Winners aren’t bogged down by past setbacks; they focus on moving forward.
• Collaborative Success: True winners aim to lift others up, embodying the idea that “a rising tide lifts all ships.”
• Self-Defined Success: Winners define their own targets and goals, not letting others dictate what success means to them.

Belief in Everyone’s Potential to Win
Everyone has the inner drive to succeed, whether in sports, academics, or character growth. I believe that every child can be a winner. Sometimes it may manifest as a defeat in competition, but the victory will still arrive after the game. How can any child lose when they have the capacity to help others, to learn, to increase their motivation, to grow and to flourish?  They can’t.